Frustrated at Forty

The stress level these past couple of weeks has been usually high. It always seems that when one of us is leaving town that we start bickering more. A lot more. This is another one of ‘those’ instances.
Last night I kind of expected a little more affection. I came home and she was sitting watching TV – the cursed device that has driven a wedge into our relationship. I will admit that she asked me to sit down and watch it with her, so maybe I’m missing the point. It was a stupid show anyway. I went to the kids and they were more interested in playing computer games than spending time with me.
I had enough and just went to bed instead. No sense in staying awake to be ignored.
She woke me up getting into bed so I held out a glimmer that she would roll over towards me and initiate something on the eve of her being gone for two weeks. No luck.
I woke up a little before her this morning. I couldn’t tell if she was going to sleep later or wake up with me. The smell of overnight alcohol being sweat out filled our room. The rising temperature of the sun beating through the windows was not helping. Once she started stirring she rolled towards me and in a fell swoop – had her top off! Maybe it was going to be a good morning afterall….
Some times, especially lately, I can sort of tell how things are going to be. I need more communication as to why it occurs but sometimes she won’t kiss me. That’s how this day started out. Maybe it’s morning breath? Maybe she’s still partially asleep? Maybe it’s something else? I would like to know.
The room was definately heating up – more sun and now our bodies pushing on eachother. She was not interested in my kissing her mouth – just her body. I was not opposed to this, but sometimes I can get the most amazing hard-on from kissing. It wasn’t going to happen today. I took wonderful advantage of being able to kiss and rub her arms, neck, shoulders, breasts and stomach. Eventually I entered her from on top. She still would not let me kiss her mouth and would not open her eyes. I’m thinking it was the partial asleep excuse. We had a good rhythm but it just was not working for me. I felt no closeness. No love. Hell… I felt nothing other than the physical thrusting that was going on. It wasn’t even that exciting.
We synchronized our motions and I could tell that she was close. During morning where the kids are around, she purposely muffles her happiness – to the point that I often have to ask if she made it. She did.
I don’t know if it was the alcohol odor, the lack of eye contact, or the lack of kissing – but I was not getting off on this. I just wanted it to be over at this point. I eventually tired of trying to make it more exciting and she wasn’t receptive that anything had not happened yet.
I don’t know how that works because several things happen when I come: my penis throbs, my body stiffens up momentarily, I tend to say/force some kind of sound – oh yeah, a fluid comes out of me! Again, I’m not saying that I understand anything but I would think that she could tell that – at the very least – she was not the recepticle for any fluids from me.
I rolled off of her and tried to see if she was more receptive to some other playing. Normally after I come, my penis loses the severity of it’s hardness. I was still hard and under other circumstances, more than able to continue. This morning – it wasn’t going any further.
She layed next to me for a bit longer, her hand brushed against my still hard cock but seemed checked out of the whole encounter. She put her clothes back on and got out of bed.
The rest of the day just went to hell from there. Everyone is fighting. Not doing what they are supposed to. Not getting ready to leave. I just want everyone to leave. I am so looking forward to this…